So April is finally here. This is going to be a whirlwind of a month for me. I'm trying to prepare myself emotionally and physically for what will be taking place!
I knew I would have such a wide mix of emotions going into this IVF cycle. Who wouldn't? I just never really knew the extent of how I would feel once it was all here. Right in front of me. So close I can almost taste it.
I'm not even sure I can put into words how I'm feeling. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel, really. Do I get my hopes up? Do I go in with guarded optimism? Do I prepare for the worst, yet hope for the best? I just don't know.
I'm really trying to go into this with the full understanding that the odds of success are against us. We're underdogs here. But I've seen lots of underdogs win. It happens everyday.
I had a great conversation with Sean yesterday about a lot of stuff. One thing he shared with me that really stuck with me is that he truly BELIEVES we are going to have success and become parents to OUR child. I know he's so afraid of things not working and me getting my heart broken, but knowing he has faith that we WILL get there means the world to me. It makes ME more positive. More hopeful. More optimistic. I'm willing to risk a broken heart. I want it so much that I'm willing to risk the devastation of failure. I'll get through it because I have him by my side.
My mind has been racing the past few days about so many things. Assuming I do in fact get pregnant, of course!
What will it feel like to be told for the first time in my life, "you're pregnant!"
How will we tell our families?
How will we tell Grace and how will she feel about it?
Will I be able to find maternity pants in "tall" sizes that will fit me? (not that I really care, but just curious!)
What will it feel like to feel a life moving inside of me?
How will Cody react to no longer being the baby in the family?!
I'm ready, April....show me what you got!
6 comments:
Hi dear - I want to say thank you so much for your kind words on my blog. Your message really cheered me up.
I think April is really going to be the month for you. I have such a good feeling about you & Pam this month. I'm hoping we both get to hear "You're pregnant" real soon!
Love your positive attitude! I hope April brings you your little miracle=) That's great that you have your DH by your side helping and supporting you through this. I don't know what I would do if my DH wasn't 100% backing my every move/decision. It really helps and I think in a lot of ways, IF has made us a stronger couple. Wish you all the best!
I will be praying for you. People beat the odds everyday, with all sorts of things. I can't wait to see your success with this...as I know you can overcome it!
Woohoo! April is going to be a great month indeed! Getting very excited for you! :)
PS... I wish we could hang out in real life... maybe some of that positivity would rub off on me!
best wishes on your journey!! IVF is a process but in the end, the payoff is so worth the struggle. hang in there!
:)
I am so happy that April is finally here!! It has been such a long ride for you and Sean. I pray that this Spring is when your dreams begin to come to life. Love ya!!!
P.S. you will be able to find maternity pants in tall sizes..... hehe!! And you are going to have so much fun shopping for maternity clothing. :)
Post a Comment