I went in for my beta today for a confirmation that I'm not pregnant.
Wouldn't you know, my beta came back at 6. They consider anything over 5 a "positive" pregnancy test. A ridiculously low number of 6 AND the heavy bleeding I had yesterday/today, is pretty much indicative of a chemical pregnancy. So I can't put all of this behind me...just yet. I go back on Monday for beta #2 which will more than likely result in a lower number.
I'm doing ok. I really am. Of course yesterday was tough, and I definitely cried and threw myself a mini pity party. I earned that though! But I also know that IVF statistics state that in many cases, the first IVF isn't successful. There is no doubt in my mind though, that some higher power is definitely putting my "strength skills" to the test. I'm a fighter, and I'll make it through! :)
This latest "event" makes me hopeful - I think.
I'm still unclear as to what my next step is. But I do know that I won't be doing anything in the near future. I'm going to take the rest of the summer to enjoy my time with my husband and my family. I'm going to work very diligently at losing some weight and getting myself in much better physical shape. Then, come early fall I'll make my next move. More than likely it will be my 2nd IVF cycle.
I want to personally thank EACH and EVERY ONE of you for your wonderfully supportive comments yesterday. It really touched me to see how many people were truly rooting for me. I never dreamed to find so much support from fellow bloggers and I THANK YOU sincerely from the bottom of my heart! xoxoxox
10 comments:
I'm so sorry Andrea :( I think you are handling this so well and you are so strong!
I'm so sorry... early losses are so rough. I hope you have a wonderful summer taking care of yourself and renewing for whatever comes next for you. Thinking of you!
I am so sorry Andrea. Sending you hugs and my thoughts are with you.
I'm so sorry, thinking of you and hoping you continue to find that inner strength to get you through this time. Continue to focus on those positive goals as you move forward and know we'll all be hear cheering you on ((hugs))
So sorry for your loss...Chemical pregnancy is hard...take the time you need hun! All the best to you next time. Enjoy your relaxing time with your husband. Who knows, maybe all that relaxing will be for the better!
I'm so sorry. Sending you positive thoughts!
This must be very hard. I am sincerely sorry this did not work. I got so upset when I geard the news. You have every right to take this time and grieve and I think it is great you are going to have a fun summer and get in shape... I would do the same thing!:) but please don't stop posting:) we are here for you and even if it is a post about how angry you are.. I want to support you:)
Hugs
Andrea - I am so sorry and sincerely feel your pain. I, too, am taking a brief break for part of the summer. I'm here for you!
I am so sorry, You are right most IVF the first is not successful. Too me chemical pregnancies are harder then negative. I hope soon enough you will be able to put this behind you and move on....snuggle up with your furbabies :)
First off I am so sorry that you had to go through that and wish you lots of luck on your 2nd cycle of IVF. I found your blog on babycenter. Your first cycle of IVF sounds a lot like mine and it sucked, I hope that both of us get pregnant and have great pregnancies in 2011 and healthy babies in 2012. I feel that this is going to be the year.
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